Christmas Basketball

The NBA rules Christmas Day; it's way better than NFL Thanksgiving for several reasons:

1. The NBA is way more fun than the NFL.
2. No Detroit Lions.
3. Playing with presents! (more on this later)

Another thing the NBA has going for it is its sweet, sweet logo, courtesy of Jerry "The Logo" West:

I'm watching Spurs-Suns right now. Amar'e Stoudemire (who is super modest) continues to wear his socks well. Steve Nash (who trains like a maniac) is throwing balls into the crowd, falling down for no good reason, and generally looking kind of old, though he's still got the skills. I've thought for a long time that Tim Duncan, Ime Udoka and Tony Parker all look pretty similar, sort of like a giant basketball version of those Russian stacking dolls.

Inner Doll: 6'2" Tony Parker

Middle Doll: 6'5" Ime Udoka

Outer Doll: 6' 11" Tim Duncan

I'm loving this years #1 ranked Christmas gift, The Macrophenomenal Pro Basketball Almanac from the guys at FreeDarko. It's pretty, smart, and about the NBA. What more do you want?

Update from ~8 minutes in the 3rd quarter: WOW. Shaq just got two offensive rebounds and dunked from a dead stop over Tim Duncan and noted fire-crotch Matt Bonner. Of course Timmy came back and sank a cold-blooded bank shot over Shaq on the other end, but you won't see that on SportCenter. Speaking of Shaq, check out his Twitter Feed.

I'm also excited for my All-Cool-Team approved basketball shoes, The Blue Chips, currently coming in the mail, hopefully in time for my Sunday morning game with my dad's geriatric friends.

I'll have a full recap and a personal box score when that game happens.

Merry Ghostface Christmas!

Arizona

My first big problem with NAVA's ranks is their snubbing of Arizona. You can't put Arizona's incredible flag behind mediocrities like Alaska and Maryland. Quebec's flag is pretty classy, but it's Canadian. Does ESPN include CFL teams in its NFL Power Rankings? No, though perhaps they should. Analysis of the CFL will be forthcoming from State Flag Power Rankings, but today is not the day for it. Now let's take look at these flags!

Stupid, childish NAVA's #6: Arizona

Arizona's flag is, in the words of Ben Coppersmith (fruit of the loins of former Arizona Congressman Sam Coppersmith!), "full of hope." It's a beautiful flag, reminiscent of a desert sunset. The colors are simple, the design is distinctive but deliberate, the symmetry perfect. The only real criticism that can be levelled at the flag is its similarity to Kamakaze designs; this criticism has little to do with the associations between Kamakazes and the terrible acts war can drive us to perform, and is more about the struggle that occurs when two big name things (Arizone and Kamakazes) are forced to share a sweet design (expanding rays of alternating color eminating from a central point). Still, Arizona's flag has got all the ingredients needed for a successful standard. It's representative, unique, and attractive. That's why NAVA's rankings are such a travesty. Take a look at the states that are ranked above it:

Heidi Montag-esque NAVA's #4: Maryland

What the fuck is going on here?! There are some bizarre rotated crosses in quadrants 2 and 4, and some funky bumble-bee-meets-checkered-flag shit going on in quadrants 1 and 3. Vertical stripes broken by diagonal checkering. It's an ugly flag, which might make it somewhat representative, as Maryland is one of the least aesthetically pleasing states around. One thing it has going for it is that it's distinctive as balls (emphasis on "stinc"). This is the kind of flag that can give a person seizures if it flaps in the breeze just right. I've been staring at this thing for hours hoping to see a spaceship, a Baltimore Orioles logo or a still shot from The Wire. There's no way this flag tops Arizona's. Busted colors, complicated design, vaccuous imagery.

"You said keep your eyes out of focus, which is misleading. You want DEEP focus!"

Positively moronic NAVA's #5: Alaska

This looks like something Piper Palin made in her first grade arts and crafts class. Eight gold stars and piece of blue construction paper does not equal the fourth best flag in North America. Yes, the Big Dipper looks sweet when viewed in the sky. Sadly, constellations do not translate well to embroidery. You lose an itsy-bit of the majesty-of-the-incomprehensible-vastness-of-the-universe in translation.


Basically, I feel that Arizona's flag has been shortchanged mightily. I'm not yet willing to give it a permanent ranking, but it's definitely better than Alaska and Maryland. The concrete rankings will come in time, as will analysis of The Universe, which remains strangely flagless. Perhaps we can create a suitable flag for it together. 'Til next time...

Update

I'm sad to say that State Flag Power Rankings has been bested in its quest to create the first ever comprehensive rankings of state flags. Those bastards over at the North American Vexillological Association beat us to it by a mere seven-and-a-half years! For those of you who aren't aware, vexillology is the scientific study of flags and symbolism, and it is NAVA's mission to further vexillology, as well as steal the thunder of us here at State Flag Power Rankings apparently!

Fear not though, loyal readers! State Flag Power Rankings is going to push forward with a new mission to create the best power rankings of state flags. I've got some serious problems with NAVA's rankings, and we're going to do all we can to discredit and embarass them! Stay posted friends...

Welcome!

Welcome to State Flag Power Rankings! The State Flag Power Rankings team is going to be working hard to bring you cutting edge analysis of each and every flag over the next few days, weeks, months, and years. We here at State Flag Power Rankings strongly encourage commenting, as it is our foremost goal to promote dialogue amongst flag enthusiasts. If we work together, god-willing, State Flag Power Rankings will create the first all-encompassing ranking system of every flag in the world!